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1.
you are the future you were born from your pain I abuse her she is happy when it rains she is pious and I am anxious to wait I am tired of seeing red everyday it's the flesh that holds me down in my dream I let you drown it's the flesh that holds me down the doors are closing in on me we were born from blood and water go on cherish your dead body we were born from blood and water
2.
you put on unknown memory it's a February blood drive denim eyes always driving me carbon poisoning and heartsick melodies for all the times we had yeah I miss it bad but I'll leave it at that I wasn't happy then I hope you feel ok feeling better now and if you're not ok you know i'll be around my angel heart breaks bum bum bum my angel heart aches bum bum bum being young is hard it's even worse growing old when we were in photographs I was painted in silver and you were gold did your mother ever hold you when she taught you how to bike lava lamp inside my old room but you had a different light I saw you cry when you didn't hide I'll always love you that's why I try I saw you hide when you didn't cry I'll always love you that's why I try I miss my friend I miss her heart I miss the way she never thought too hard I was so young and not so smart I vow to never fix a broken heart
3.
This is where God made you and me, filled with water, blue skies, green life to breathe But I’ll sing outside the garden we grew up in, for I have made a grave mistake of not knowing what I’m doing. I’m not prepared for how much I will miss you. I’m not familiar on how to let love grow when hearts aren’t close. I’m not prepared for how much I will miss you. My hearts been getting weaker, and tell me my body won’t follow. When I’m gone I hope that you’ll be safe. How could I attack your faith when it’s me who didn’t stay? And this mistake will cost my life, I’m not strong enough to be on my own. My God I’m sorry, God I’m sorry I should’ve been there for you. If the love for me is gone don’t worry I understand. You were a part of me, removed from my body. Maybe when we’re older we will find ourselves together, locking eyes in one another, I know we’re made for each other, Our love was way too early, will you still see me as worthy for a chance? I’ll wait for this a love that I’ve always meant. I’ll wait for you a love that I won’t lose.
4.
So this goes out to all the ones who believed in me, maybe next time you can place your faith on someone who’s not afraid to be someone else, somewhere new, something I could never do. Coward, what a fake, liar, mistake. I wonder where my passion went, it must’ve took off when she left. That’s no excuse, it’s nothing new, I should’ve found it someone else. I’m alone more than I should be, bottle filled to the brim with whiskey. I’ll hit the ground when I reach Florida, I was only hoping you’d stay with me. So this goes out to all the ones who believed in me, maybe next time you can place your faith on someone who’s not afraid to be someone else, somewhere new, something I could never do. Coward, what a fake, liar, mistake. This goes out to the ones who I promised to write a song, to Derek, to Jess and Jess, to all the girls I fell in love with. I’m sorry, I couldn’t do it, I choked, I fucking blew it. Taylor, Christine, Andreia, I’m sorry. Stop feeling sorry for myself, My mother said I needed help. I tried to kill myself back in July, but I knew I couldn’t kiss you if I were to die. What a selfish way to leave, I couldn’t think about all the ones who needed me, I couldn’t shake the fact that I was worthless, so useless, wasted oxygen on a person. Like cursive, filled with self-doubt cause I’m not perfect, they heard this. Called a doctor so I wouldn’t hurt anymore.

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Keep using your voices, peace to all, fight for change.

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released June 5, 2020

All songs written & produced by respective artists

Mixed & mastered by STATEN

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